It is but months ago that we welcomed the new year. Life is short, indeed. Here’s us facing another year and decade of our lives. 2019 and the past years has been a roller-coaster of a ride and passed by that fast, that I did not realized that I have grown so much.
Perhaps, I am that the same aloof, introvert individual fearful to face the world. I have always been dependent to people next to me. I am still that shy girl, trying to reach enough level of confidence, self-reliance and self-trust but to no avail. Until now, I still feel that I am shrinking infront of the crowd, trembling while speaking to the audience and having two minds if someone familiar infront of me in the PUV will smile back at me.
This kind of behavior affect volume in my life and in everything that I do. It is sad though that I have been working on overcoming these for years but I am unsuccessful. The hope is to keep on trying until it’s done. That is life.
2019 is my hardest year but having that, it is still the most beautiful year, so far. I experienced hopelessness and loss. I have lots of pain inside. I struggle with career and trying to put it in the right path seems impossible day by day. However, those ached wonderfully, reminding that I am a human too. I never ever questioned how God crafted this life; I only looked at the thought that things happen for a greater purpose. I always remind myself that I am still blessed and favored for living this life and for doing things that I love. This pain? Maybe it is just because I looked too far that I forgot to check what is in front of me. For this, I started facing my present, embracing my realities and taking one thing at a time, chasing one dream at a time. This is what I am believing, that through walking in my own pace, I will get there in time, in my time. I have worries, there are people who dislike me, there are things I cannot easily do but my God is greater than any heartache this world will throw at me. Faith moves mountains and my existence is testament to that.
I am still grateful. I do not forget that amidst the fathomless pain are God’s greatest blessings. I cannot remember moments that God neglected a prayer. I was simply redirected and it is more than enough to be thankful for. Life is fair still.
The past year, I learned to focus on the blessings, our complete family and simply be grateful. Surprisingly, it made me genuinely happy.
In 2019, one precious thing that I also learned is to let go, to let go material things and possessions that I believed mine but truly not.
I learned to give that new skirt I thought will look good on me. I packed those stationeries I have been keeping for years and made those as presents. The extra metal straws, extra travel envelope, extra 2020 planners, and those things I bought in two just because. I hope it would be a step one of letting myself free from bond on entities that do not matter so much. I am decluttering.
I hope in 2020, I could declutter more than material things. Putting myself where I should be. Chasing new dreams. Letting go of what I could not do. Throwing away negative habits of overthinking, impulsive buying and being neglectful because I am too much pressured. Having new place. Finding new career path. I have always wanted to align, prioritize, focus and put self into perspective, but few other matters such as fears, worries, what if’s, and having less confidence hinder me to.
I hope 2020 is a fresh start.
I also hope this blog will gain new friends in 2020. To those who stayed, always sticking with me and dealing with my rambling all these years, I truly appreciate you. Praying 2020 would still be a productive year in content creation, blogging and events. I truly live for these. There might still be sponsored posts but I wish to run this blog as personal space, with organic more than sponsored contents.
Before I end this post, let me share to you my favorite photos as we trace down 2019 memory lane.
I started the year with day trip to Claveria, Misamis Oriental.
Then, visited different places in Singapore on February.
That include Universal Studios Singapore!
Then, had a quick getaway to Seven Seas Waterpark in nearby Opol, Misamis Oriental with fellow CDO Bloggers.
I also checked Agutayan White Island of my hometown off the bucketlist.
I also had fun with our team once again in Camiguin!
Participated in our office outing to Alomah’s Place in Manolo Fortich, Bukidnon.
Then, went to Hong Kong last October.
Included a day trip to Hong Kong Disneyland!
And realized my dream of a photo with this beauty at Madame Tussauds Hong Kong Wax Museum.
Thereafter, we crossed the sea to the beautiful and splendid Macao.
This is the boulevard along Macao Tower.
Upon arriving home, had a weekend with the bestfriend to Iligan.
I also should not forget our regular attendance to different branches of Chingkeetea! I made it to its Vamenta and Iligan branches. It would always be our favorite coffeeshop. Here’s to more cups of fruit tea and bowls of ramyun, and places to visit in 2020!