I always find it amazing that each year, as we grow older, we tend to find our core purpose in this world. Well, maybe not much of exactly knowing what is it that we have to do for the rest of our lives, but in every day that unfolds, it reveals the checklist that we have to accomplish, it sets our direction and positions our perspective on where to focus and what to prioritize ahead of our game.
In this very day, I turn 25. I reached my quarter life. According to one of my favorite fashion bloggers Kryz Uy, when I would be able to live a hundred year in this lifetime, being 25 is my quarter life.
For the past few years, my special days mark a specific period where I greatly see that I should step up in my life, where I should embark change if there is a need to. I do not know for the rest of you but for me, reaching a year older is a reminder tapping me that there is something more in my bucketlist that I should mark check on as soon as possible.
Last year, during my birthday while I was on my training in Manila, I received my notice of promotion. It was very unexpected, though I know I answered enough. I am very grateful for it. My God indeed has blessed me so much even I am not His perfect child. I was so much flawed, but He lifted me up.
My months after, however, were more challenging than ever, that almost made me decide of giving up. However, I believe I have come to the point in my life where giving up is not an option. I need to fight for myself, I have to exceed my capability for growth, I have to be the most patient for my family, who needs me. I studied, and now, still studying. I, at times, failed and then tried once more, and I repeat the process over again. Learning each single thing and facing a deadline at the same time is dreadful but still, I am hopeful (always hopeful) because even at my darkest times, I view something like this as a blessing.
Then again, during my 24th, I experienced hopelessness, emptiness and being overwhelmed with every heavy thing in this life, both work and personal life. My worries were so much extreme that I some time question the path I took and the road that leads me. I always find myself very exhausted, restless and unsatisfied. I was craving for more, and I doubt what is it. Maybe, it has to do with unfulfilled dreams and unachieved goals.
Living and leading life is never easy, and I know it would never be. All we have to do is extend our patience, and over and over again, assess our life and balance everything to reach our dreams and live our goals in life.
Having all these, nevertheless, I declare the past year is when I was at my happiest state. Growing older and growing up each day is an amazing experience. They say when you were so down, there would be days in between that you will be lifted up, and worth every time your brows tend to meet, when you were so sad.
In the past year, I learned to appreciate independence and stand on my own. As an only child, I was used to being caught when I fall down, I used to be understood, I used to be taught. At some point, it is frustrating to be like that because the reality is you, I, should have been trained to walk on my own. I appreciate all my parents’ effort of sending me away from home to study to teach me these life lessons, but I know to myself that wherever I go and whatever I do, they will always understand me and have my back. However, that is not always the scenario, you will meet people who will do otherwise – people who will push you down instead of catching you from falling, who will never hear from you when you try to explain and who will never teach you even with simple things you asked him for, people who will leave you hanging with a heavy burden. In this, we will learn how to be stand by ourselves. That is why it is important to be at some aspects, we will be independent. It is important that we will be independent in making decisions, in determining our own path and in choosing our battles. It is through these that we could live our life with happiness, gratitude and contentment.
This year, I aim to be a stronger, braver and a more goal-oriented person. Most of all, I aim to be a forgiving person to myself. I made a lot of mistakes – big mistakes and failed myself lots of times than I imagined, but these things are bound to happen because we are only humans; we have our boiling point. That, I should consider. Specifically, I tried on squeezing myself between my job and my passion in writing, in blogging (and nearly inserting Masteral Studies too) but still struggled. I learned that I have to put the need first, before the wants. I am still struggling in doing so, but I am working on it. As for my Masteral Studies, I gave myself two years after because I still have to master my current job. My checklist is getting longer but I have to process all these things and accomplish it one step at a time.
I also aim to travel more alone or with some friends this year. I believe the key to overcoming an overwhelming career life is to spend possible rest days in traveling, in order to think positively, relax the mind, see the things that matter the most and discover what is more to life than the ordinary things that we do daily. More importantly is to embrace the fact that people journey in their own pace, their own time clock. We are the protagonists of our life story and it is our responsibility to lead it beautifully. Hence, there should be less stress, and instead of being bitter, write it in a better way that when people read it, they will smile and be inspired. After all, our top goal in this life is to live meaningfully and be an inspiration to others without trying it so hard.
Before I end this post, I thank my parents, family, churchmates, friends, CDO Bloggers and colleagues in government service for a beautiful 24th year that was. Most of all, to God above for making all things possible.
Thank you for taking time to read this birthday post and yes, hello quarter-life! I am so ready for you.